The “Talk” (Weekend Poll)

By: wheatmeister
November 16, 2013

Timmy. Sex is a dirty, filthy business. Save it for marriage.

I learned about sex the normal way:  on the playground from a fellow third grader.  She was fuzzy on the details, but essentially, it involved a boy putting his finger in a girl’s belly button and then nine days later, she had a baby.  So I was pretty much an expert.  How about you?

How did you first learn about sex? (choose all that apply)

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Discuss.

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8 Responses to The “Talk” (Weekend Poll)

  1. NewlyHousewife on November 16, 2013 at 7:21 AM

    What about: Learned everything at school and church parents didn’t talk about it.

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  2. MH on November 16, 2013 at 9:30 AM

    Making babies done with an air pump: http://www.bitrebels.com/lifestyle/how-to-make-a-baby-7-pictures/

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  3. Mel on November 16, 2013 at 10:49 AM

    My mom was a little unorthodox on this one… When she was pregnant with my sister (I was 3) I kept asking questions. So she finally just gave me the birds and the bees right then and there with all the details. Later she checked out some “miracle of life” video from the library and I saw the pictures of the sperm/egg, development of the fetus and a live delivery. Since I was 3, I thought “OK, cool” and didn’t think twice about it. By the time I reached puberty and everyone was whispering about it, I could not figure out why everyone thought it was such a big deal and why so many of my friends didn’t know about it already.

    Yeah it was weird telling a 3 year old about sex, but because of it talking about sex was never awkward to me.

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  4. alice on November 16, 2013 at 4:22 PM

    My sex education was complicated in the 50s to say the least.

    I had a very premature puberty that was accompanied, initially, by considerable physical pain. My mother took me to the doctor to deal with the mysterious pains and he identified that it was my breast buds beginning to develop and attempted to explain what was happening to me and to my mother. I was too young to understand it and my mother was too embarrassed to further explain it or, really, talk about it at all. So what I got was confused and incomplete at best.

    But I knew something the other kids didn’t so I was the one sharing info that was silly and incomprehensible but, apparently, recognizable enough to adults that other parents started calling my parents and I got in serious trouble. …that I hardly understood any more than the pain I had heroically “survived” or the physiology that I thought I was just repeating from a knowledgeable source.

    Later that summer I went to summer camp — an generic variety girls’ camp in New England — along with my first bra and my now apparent little breasts. I was ordered not to change clothes with the other girls without any further explanation. It was completely humiliating and I didn’t even know what I’d done to be so offensive.

    Eventually, the first spot appeared in my underpants. My mother discovered it when I was taking a bath. That’s when — wet and prune — I got what was supposed to pass for “instruction”. I think it amounted to “Here. Now you need these and don’t ever go swimming when you’re using them. And wash those filthy things!”

    Any questions about why I think openness about and appreciation of human sexuality is not only healthy but essential? (…not that I’ve ever achieved the “appreciation of” part of that equation.

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  5. BD on November 16, 2013 at 6:25 PM

    Mel… wow. Cool. Kind of wish I had done that with my kids.

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  6. KT on November 17, 2013 at 1:00 PM

    My mom talked to me about it. Was not embarrassed. She also got me a book. My parents were not LDS. It was a good approach. I also had sex ed in school where I learned about stds and pregnancy in health terms from our PE teacher and wrestling coach. It was fine. One of his gems……”never arm wrestle a uterus”!

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  7. fbisti on November 19, 2013 at 8:06 AM

    I also grew up through puberty in the late 50′s. Never heard a word about “the birds and the bees” at school or at home. Got the details when 13 from a 16-yr old–he was anxious to share.

    Not wanting for this to be repeated for my boys, I sat each of them down for the “talk” when they were 10 (1989 and 1992) both had already learned all about it from friends (at school or at church. I didn’t ask.)

    Beyond that sharing of anecdotes, let me say that the church (and all Christian religions, apparently) has been woefully wrong in its painting of anything sexual as dirty, secret, and of the devil (or, the “natural man”–literally correct). This is obviously, very dysfunctional. Our aged GAs were raised in the sexually repressed Victorian “era” (literally, when I was a boy), Their thorough and brain-dead (or more kind: unthinking) approach as the culture around them began showing ankles (and so on) was to increase the repression of anything sexual.

    Modern, knowledgeable, objective psychology informs us of the many problems that can (and do) arise from such attitudes/teachings. God certainly knew (everything–?) of this. But, I guess He didn’t tell our inspired leaders.

    From having sat on numerous church courts (as they were called then) I heard how some men were motivated/pushed into seeking sexual activity outside of a marriage where their wives were no longer interested in such a nasty activity, especially after having babies was finished. A good friend commiserates with me that while his aging wife will still allow sex. it is strictly limited to the same old, same old–anything else being “dirty.” These are only a minor aspect of the damage done by this approach.

    IMO

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  8. Heber13 on November 22, 2013 at 1:59 PM

    I need to have a followup talk with my 10 year old. I talked to him a few years ago about it, but I think I need to give him more details.

    I am not just thinking about the subject itself…but I feel that despite any efforts I try to protect the kids from too much info or bad pictures, in today’s world they’re gonna be exposed to stuff.

    So my talk will need to be about the natural process and biological stuff I got when I was in 3rd grade from my dad, but also trying to explain to him how the Internet and TV/Movies don’t really depict it right, which my dad never had to deal with for me.

    Kids are really exposed to a lot before they should be in today’s world. But I can’t wish that away. I need to talk about it with them.

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