“For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God;” (Romans 3:23)
At one time or another we all lie. It is mostly to ourselves about one thing or another, but sometimes to others. In some cases, it is a “kind” lie such as, “no, that color looks great on you” or “I’ll only be a minute” (Underestimation of time).
When we do, and we recognize it, we ask for forgiveness from those we might have offended or hurt, and, from God and we move on.
Now, there are two important stories in the news about lying. One is a pretty sure bet and the other is not so clear at this point.
First, we have Lance Armstrong. After years of denials, he came clean, so to speak, with Oprah Winfrey to admit something almost everyone in and out of the sport of cycling knew—that he was using banned and illegal substances throughout his cycling career and especially during his run of 7 Tour De France titles.
“A lie told often enough becomes the truth.” This quote is attributed to Vladimir Lenin, but even that appears to be untrue. But nevertheless, we have seen this borne out in the Armstrong story.
So, now he confesses. But with his lying, he left a wake of destruction of other people’s lives, his sport (and sports in general) and ultimately in him as a person. Whatever good he has done in overcome cancer, his LiveStrong foundation and other chartable acts will be long overshadowed by the “big lie.”
As Tevye says in Fiddler on the Roof, “Good news travels fast, bad news refuses to leave.”
We’ll be hearing of Lance Armstrong for many weeks before it dies back to where it came.
This brings me to the strange case of Notre Dame star linebacker and Mormon, Manti Te’o. His alleged girlfriend, Lenay Kekua, who died of Leukemia in September never, existed. Fake messages, fake pictures and a fake persona. You can read about the whole story in any paper or online site you chose, but the publication that broke the story is Deadspin.
The big questions are:
“What did Manti know and when did he know it?” Was he “in” on it or was he completely a victim?
Now, the whole story is a lie, but it is unclear who all is implicated in it. It appears that Ronaiah Tuiasosopo, a supposed friend of Te’o and a part of a famous football family, is the perpetrator.
The real problem of the story centers around Manti’s insistence that he spoke to her every night for four months, that he listened to her sleep on his cell phone and that they met at Stanford in 2009 after a Notre Dame-Stanford football game.
Even his parents, who live in Mormon enclave, Laie, Hawaii, home of the PCC and BYU-Hawaii, talked about their meetings. Where did they get that information?
So, the story has to have one of two explanations:
1. Te’o was totally fooled by the hoax, perfectly pulled off by Tuiasosopo. Which, of course, makes him appear dumb as rocks. Or,
2. He was in on it, at the very least playing along. This makes him a liar.
So, in my mind, I have to ask myself this question. Why would he lie? This is a star football player that could have probably had any girl, let alone just about any Mormon girl, he wanted. Why would he need to make up one?
There are two sides to Te’o that people describe. There is the humble, nice, would go out of his way to be nice to people kind of guy, and religious. Just the Mormon example you would want attending a Catholic University. There are others who describe him as attention-seeking, which this kind of a story with its sad details and tragic ending would garner.
We all know that star college athletes get very special treatment. They often get a pass for bad behavior, even at religious-oriented schools like BYU. Many people have come to Te’o’s defense, as they did for Lance Armstrong. When the truth finally comes out, Te’o will still be drafted high by an NFL team because he is a walking money machine, Both for him and football.
So, at this point, only two people know the real truth, Te’o and Heavenly Father.
Finally, as always we are not the final judge of Te’o’s life. Chances are he will redeem himself from this situation and go on to have a storied career in the NFL, making millions of dollars and having legions of adoring fans. There will always be an asterisk next to his name noting the hoax that happened in college.
Te’o is not the only Mormon athlete to turn down BYU and go to another school. He is not the only star athlete to not serve a mission for the Church (can you say Jimmer Ferdette?). But one has to wonder, even a little bit, if this would have happened if he had gone to BYU instead of Notre Dame? Or, if that really has anything to do with it.
Remember, we are all liars at one time or another. The online world we live in now, makes lying easy, possibly without consequences.
Wheat & Tares 
A sad episode, but we needn’t unduly wring our hands. The Church is for the prefecting of the Saints…and some need it quite a bit.
If he’d gone on a mission, it would’ve helped, but the mission field is full of elders and sisters that display character defects. It comes down to having to pick them from the human race. If he’d gone to BYU…again, the students GENERALLY exhibit high moral standards, but not always.
Have we ALL “lied”…well, there are many, I guess, who are practiced at it to the point of psychosis. I’m getting one out of my life, and not soon enough. Some others tell the proverbial “white lie”, but aren’t willing to immerse themselves in a world of deceit. Others…well, they just tell the truth, and never have to remember what they say and to whom. But I wonder if to some extent everyone doesn’t lie to themselves. For some things that I observe folks do, they’d have to be self-deluded.
The Teo story is just so strange. Why would he make up a girlfriend that he met only once at a Stanford game? It just seems so unnecessary.
At least we can understand why Lance lied.
Too bad Margaret Mead and Derek Freeman aren’t alive to ponder this one.
Gay cover-up.
I either buy the gay story line, or the naive one.
I met a girl online 10+ years ago and we “dated” without meeting for nearly 9 months. During that time we never met, physically, and only talked on the phone and emailed and messaged each other. She lived a couple of states away and every time I tried to schedule a time to meet up, she was either out of town or on her way somewhere. I chalked it up to “schedules” just not matching up. Finally, after about 8 full months of this, the day before I was to drive and meet her, I got a letter from her in the mail describing a “hoax” that she had done. She had pretended to be her best friend, at least physically. She had emailed me pictures throughout the timeframe, but they were all of her friend, though she sold it to me as though they were her.
The letter came with “real” pictures – and, as you can imagine, they looked nothing alike – and she was aghast at how I couldn’t still go through with it and visit her and continue our relationship.
From my standpoint, I can buy the naivte. I can buy a relationship lasting a year when the dude in the relationship is a top flight All-American going to a rigorous school. I can buy that his and her schedules just wouldn’t match up. I can understand all of that.
And, ultimately, if that’s the case… I COMPLETELY understand the embarrassment that he would feel if he knew nothing of the hoax. It’s shattering, honestly.
I’m not saying that’s the case, but there is a story there if it was a hoax and he know nothing about it.
It’s just my personal opinion, of course. I don’t mean for anyone to assume I imbue it with any more importance than that. I think he wanted the sympathy and the drama to tip the Heisman vote in his favor. Shame on him! And I think Notre Dame was ambitious for all the same glory and actively has prostituted itself in trying to insulate him from blame.
Same goes for Armstrong and the Post Office that endorsed him. Only it’s possibly even more tragic because, without the doping, he could realistically have been a genuine hero to some for overcoming cancer and having a credible — if not dominating — athletic career.
But here’s the part that rankles a whole lot more: this business that we must all put on ashes and sackcloth because some high profile athletes embarrassed themselves and deceived others. I won’t do it. I’m not responsible in any way for their subordinating any sense of ethics they may have begun with to their ambition. I didn’t lionize them when they were heroes. I won’t absolve them to attempt to wash away any embarrassment that may accrue to those associated with them.
I live an honest and humble life. I want no part of their heroism or debasement. But I sure as shooting don’t want to be associated with either of them or called a liar to mitigate the personal choices they have made.
Alice,
It was my not intention for any of us to take a hit for either of these guys. I suppose my point was that it is in our fallen human nature to lie when it suits us and we are all guilty of that from time to time.
But, as these two stories point out, it takes the lie to a whole other level potentially affecting huge numbers of people.
All the more reason to be careful about who we worship and hold up in high esteem.
And, it says a lot about what is valued in society.
“But one has to wonder, even a little bit, if this would have happened if he had gone to BYU instead of Notre Dame?”
I don’t wonder at all. I do wonder why you wonder.
As for Teo, I think he was duped but couldn’t figure a way out. He is only 21 and I think he felt the story would just go away after a while. I think this because he publicly continued the charade in interviews even after he told others that the whole thing was a fake. I can see him being embarrassed that he was taken in and not wanting it to come out. At this point, he just needs to tell it all. It will go away much sooner if he does, although either way this will follow him for a long time. NFL road games to a rival’s stadium will be no picnic for him.
In football, it is about making plays and winning. Virtue is an afterthought, if at all.
He’ll be just fine doing that.
Yes Jeff, you’re right. We aren’t talking about Ray Lewis and his murder charge anymore. Now we’re talking about his farewell tour as a great football player for the Baltimore Ravens.
http://www.amazon.com/Bottom-Line-Integrity-Quinn-McKay/dp/1586853805/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1358565013&sr=1-1&keywords=The+bottom+line+on+integrity is worth a read and a revist on this topic.
I feel bad for the guy. I hope he wasn’t lying about the relationship. I have a different opinion concerning the line “The online world we live in now, makes lying easy, possibly without consequences.”
There have been grifters, hustlers, and snake oil salesmen throughout history (there’s a sucker born every minute). What makes the internet different, is that in the past these liars moved from one town to the next with no one knowing their past lies. Now with the internet, their lies live forever and it’s easier to expose those lies.
#9 – consider the examples of Brothers Steve Young and Vai Sikahema before you presume to judge football players. They run the gamut of the human race, just like we bloggers at W&T. True, the world of American Football, like major sports everywhere where money and false adoration is heaped upon young men, not all mature enough to handle it, has its sordid side. But that’s ultimately the fault of the fans. If we go to the games and/or watch them on TV and purchase the sponsors’ products, w/o regard to these sordid tales, then we tacitly give our stamp of approval.
Remember the movie “Miracle” about the 1980 Winter Olympics USA men’s hockey team and their unexpected winning of the gold medal? What I liked was at the end showing how these young men, not all of whom went on to the NHL, made good of their lives. I hope that in ANY college sports program that the boosters and coaches remember that the real success of their program is in the lives that their proteges lead, not merely how they perform on the fields or in the arenas of competition.